This woman’s day I decided to get back to writing – blogging. The topic I want to start with is a fairly recent realisation and something I am working on.
Last year was a defining one for me. I went through several transitions. I returned to work post a four year maternity break exactly one year back. It started the four month journey of travelling back and forth to Hyderabad. I was suddenly away for 3-4 days every week from my child. It wasn’t easy to say the least. It made sense to move to Hyderabad to keep the three year old closer to me and stay more focused at work. I had to leave my well oiled support system in Mumbai to make this shift. It wasn’t easy in Hyderabad either. My husband would then do weekends with us and weekdays I was miserable managing a new job and a three year old without stable support. By October we knew its not working and as luck would have it, I got a job offer in Mumbai which meant another relocation. During my last week in Hyderabad, even after months of frustration, exhaustion and lack of sleep, all I felt was GRATEFUL.
Transition back to Mumbai, to a new demanding job was far from easy. The sleepless nights did not completely go away. And the now four year old still craves for my time during weekdays. But that last week in Hyderabad made me aware of the lens with which I looked at life. I used to see what was missing in my life but that week I only saw what I had. Since then I remind myself everyday to be grateful for what I have.
A working woman struggles with multiple emotions and juggles her life priorities all the time. From kids’ school requirements, to work expectations, to home and family. She has a lot going on through her head all the time and while there may be help, the mental load does not go away. While being thankful still won’t make the mental load go away, it does help prevent stress related ailments. It also betters relationships, specially with kids and spouse. In this blog I want to be grateful for my life and all that constitutes it.
My work: NowFloats job offer came at a time I least expected it. I had spent four years working on projects that wouldn’t convert to entrepreneurial ventures. I am grateful to Jas (Jasminder Gulati) who asked me to join him. I am grateful to have been part of NowFloats journey, even if it was brief. The place gave me a way back to full time work and learning about dynamic startup environment. NowFloats functions like a family that stands by you. I have several stories from my time there. The time when it was a school holiday and I did not have a babysitter or day care. My colleagues kept my three year old entertained with colours and food while I did my meetings. The time I entered the work floor with paper airplanes all over. A bunch of them along with my child were competing on whose plane flies farthest. The time I was in a meeting with the finance head and our CEO, Jas. We were in the middle of intense discussion where my child just walked in and wanted me. Jas kept drawing shapes on the white board and asked her to colour while we continued to work on org plans. I will never forget that moment in my lifetime. I am grateful for that support.
And I am equally grateful for my current job at Aeon Credit Services India. It came right at the time when I was exhausted from managing everything in Hyderabad. It was unexpected and serendipitous.
My Support Staff: I have often heard that behind every successful man is a woman and behind every successful woman is a maid. We all know the value of hot home cooked meal and a clean house. Day cares, maids, cooks, drivers make our lives easier and I am thankful to have help at home.
My Parents: I am grateful for my parents, specially my father who spent more than half the year staying at my house helping me out with my three year old. He picked her up from school and when I moved to Hyderabad, he started to drop her to school because it gave me extra half hour in the morning before I had to be at work. My mother managed my household. They were my pillars of support when I could barely find time for them or my child.
My Parent-in-Laws: I am grateful for my parents-in-laws who came to me when my parents had to go back home. They are old and fragile but ran behind my energetic three year old when there was no babysitter. They took care of her when I was late from work. They even danced with her to entertain her. They are supportive of every decision I take, beyond anything I could have ever imagined.
My Family: Most of all, I am grateful for my husband and my child for their belief in me and immense support that keeps me going at work. A child who tells me she misses me when I’m at work but kisses me goodbye. A husband who believes in me and has made several accommodations in his work schedule and makes all the effort to share my mental load.
It is not to say that there is no stress. The mental load or invisible work does not completely go away. I still struggle more often than not to manage my time better, still snap at my child and get upset with my family. I just constantly remind myself to be thankful for what I have and that energises me.
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